10. Baby shower invitations now hold the same appeal as an emergency root canal. (Hahaha, just kidding, at least with an emergency root canal you can be alone with your thoughts and don’t have to show up with a gift for your dentist).
9. You completely lose it when your partner masturbates during your fertile window. (Thanks a lot dude, maybe that bunch of wadded-up tissues or your computer mouse will get pregnant now. Good job.)
8. Your iPhone’s camera roll is filled with pictures of ovulation tests, taken through multiple filters. (If it’s a boy, Amaro. If it’s a girl we’ll name her Juno, Valencia, or X-Pro II after my grandmother).
7. Seeing a glass of apple juice makes you have an uncontrollable urge to test it for pregnancy.
6. You think it is totally normal to describe the consistency of your cervical mucus to your menstrual cycle buddy.
5. You have a menstrual cycle buddy. (Also, if you both enjoy talking about cervical mucus while bike riding, you have a menstrual cycle CYCLE buddy ….sorry for that joke, we’ll see ourselves out.)
4. You see TTC acronyms everywhere you look…DPO, CM, BBT…
3. You check Glow more often than you check Facebook.
2. You have dozens of creative ‘pinned’ ideas for how you’re going to announce your BFP… (hiring that skywriter to draw a pair of baby shoes in the sky is going to be expensive but SO WORTH IT.)
1. …but what you will really do is sit there speechless, cry, and then take another pregnancy test!